Tuesday 2 July 2013

Survey Rant!

Surveys: 

Why does everyone want a survey completed these days?

Banks

I was in the bank for two minutes today and I was told that because I had used the counter services, it would trigger an automated phone call were I could then complete a customer satisfaction survey. I was to press one for very satisfied etc.

Really! wow I was actually served by a real person and for that I am expected to give a glowing report on how the staff member was kind, attentive seemed happy in their job, the enviroment was pleasant blah blah blah.  For goodness sake what a load of rubbish! people will either put the phone down or just press number 1 repeatedly.  Useful things then surveys we can now add surveys at the end of ``there are lies, damned lies, stats and surveys.``

When I left school and worked in a large department store a manager patrolled the shop floor making sure we gave great customer service, otherwise you were sacked. Maybe the banks wouldn`t lose millions if they had that approach today.

Council Office

Go into a council office and a machine shows you a traffic light system of faces to give customer feedback. Red for we need to improve, amber for we could do better and green for we got it right.  Well what if I kick the damn machine and leave a note saying I`d don`t like the idea that they bought you in the first place! it is our money that paid for it after all.

Eating out

Along with the cutlery comes the survey flyer, yes I might win £200 in voucher or a free meal but then I probably won`t.

Night Out

Bought a ticket for a concert, theatre, cinema, bungee jump off the Shard ? Notice the survey that comes in 24 hours after your event. How was your night, did we do well? 

Actually no you didn`t do well! you provided a service I paid for, end of it please.

I am a comper I expect email surveys but that is part of the comping world. Fill this in and you might win some vouchers. I accept that sort of survey and usually just delete them.

In every aspect of any kind of `service` now though you are being asked to complete a survey, it is passive bullying if you ask me. We are getting so used to this `feedback` expectation that I doubt we even notice anymore we are our giving email address, dob, gender, income to name but a few details that are requested.

GP

Visited your GP in the last year? fill in this survey please it is detailed and will help us provide a better service. Really? how can a survey help provide better service when what is needed is better opening times, more doctors, less waiting and a doctor who has the time of day for you. Everyone already knows this it has probably been written on thousands of surveys. Not changed a thing though.

I will stop ranting now so could you please just fill in a short survey at the bottom of this post to say how well I did.  Please leave all your details and your phone number so I can get our automated machines to phone you when you are having you dinner or are in the bath.




Tags survey, dining out, events, tickets, humour.

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